#1. When we suggest getting to the airport an hour ahead of time, we mean it.
#2. Stop trying to make “carryon” happen. It’s not going to happen.
#3. You’re in public, so please dress like it.
#4. We have to go through security too, so how ’bout you pull your liquids out the first time they ask? It would go a lot faster.
#5. We’re sorry the storm delayed your fight, but did you want to die?
#6. Trust us, we’ll let you know when it’s time to board.
#7. When we do, please wait your turn.
#8. Because even as we say that, we’ll still get these people…
#9. Please board efficiently. Yes, all the seats suck. So just sit.
#10. And if you tow it, know you’re gonna stow it. If we have to touch it, we’ll tag it. Fair warning.
#11. Your pet’s ESV vest isn’t fooling anyone…
#12. Oh, and we love reciting our drink menu 100+ times (sarcastic smile).
#13. We also really love it when you poke us, repeatedly push your call button, and form a line near the LAV (after we’ve repeatedly asked you not to).
#14. Again, this airplane isn’t your own private space. So calm it with the drinking…
#15. …And stop leaving things in the seatback pocket.
#16. Oh! And in case no one’s told you, deplaning isn’t a race.
#17. Honestly, we’re just here to help. The experience isn’t easy on us either.
#18. For example, we also hate mergers.
#19. So if you promise to be nice…
#20. We’ll try to be too.
#21. Maybe… ?
Want to see more of this hilarity? Check us out on Pinterest or take a look at our other blogs! Until next time Interliners… ?
Author: Emily (@ID90 Travel)
Emily is the Content Marketing Specialist here at ID90 Travel. An avid non-rev flyer (she grew up in the industry), and passionate private pilot, Emily can’t get enough of all things aviation. When not writing awesome ID90 Travel content she can be found on a Texas patio, being one with nature, or annoying her ID90T co-workers with her many, many, crowdsourcing questions.